childhood to the
back went things wish I

brilliant was victory each When

easy were Smiles

irrelevant is Time

seamless and fluid is It

and remain you lets It

you consumes bit by Bit

forwards Backwards

again Backwards

childhood in swing that Like

away me take Words

time of end the At

mine be shall Glory

that find to Only

behind look shouldn’t Stories

P.S. Avenoir means the desire the memory could flow backwards – perhaps then it makes sense?? http://www.dictionaryofobscuresorrows.com/post/103388659265/avenoir-n-the-desire-that-memory-could-flow 

Alone in a room in the dark…

You – staring at me

from your shiny surface

past my fading eyes

awaiting my disgrace

Me – penning down

your latest sin

hoping to hear

a different voice from within

You – bouncing back

the dying rays of the sun

sending subtle messages

I am the one

Me – scribbling faithlessly

on my paper skin

my sharp stylus jabbing

like a thousand prickling pins

You – sighing out loud

in a room full of quiet

ensuring I hear you loud

and I fall just right

Me – waiting hopelessly

for the edge of this fear

where I smile

and draw you near

You – blushing a crimson red

with each jab of my words

Me – smiling right back at you

bidding goodbye to our world.




Hides behind

Thinly veiled smiles

Talks of flowers

And knives

In the same stale breath

Envisions a death


Is Athena

Ethereal and yet – very real

Is her mirror’s favorite subject

And yet in her mind it rejects


Voice sounds like an angel

When its busy not sounding like a mongrel

Walk is a swift breeze

And is also an easy tease


Is a merciful vengeance

A heart’s cold resurgence

Runs away from affection

And yet longs for an aching affliction


Is a vessel brimming with hope

With who you have decided to elope

Doesn’t always swing both ways

But you will take your chance today


Is slowly moving away

To your heart’s dismay


Is looking at you

Like you are the new Taboo


Doesn’t want this dance

Was never hinting at a romance?


Wishes to unsee

The desperation for love that is – me



The Little Red Dot

I don’t remember

the first day

I just remember

it hurt.

I didn’t see

it coming

I only saw

the little red dot.

I never understood

the pain that seared through

I only understood

the shame that was passed on

Now I hide

the dull ache with a smile

Wish I didn’t have to hide

the lifeless cotton detritus


How does it feel?

He asks

I was never allowed to feel

I reply

Why don’t we make love?

He asks

Honey, I am too busy shedding love.

I reply


I was thirteen

when the little red dot came at first

I was suddenly NOT thirteen

women grow up in a day – my mother said

The world was quiet

all of a sudden

and the only thing that wasn’t quiet?

The screaming little red dot on my school uniform

They pointed, they laughed

Guess schools are tougher than the world

My sister didn’t laugh

she knew what it meant, those mean words.


Do you still hide

your stains?

She asks

Do you hide

your smiles?

I say

Did they whisper everyday to you too?

she asks

Did they tell you

that the little red dot

was taboo?

red rose.png



Jibber Jabber

Blank pages

Blank mind

Blank thoughts 

An empty mind

Bright lights

Bright shapes

Bright shrouds 

A shiny gaze

Dark nights 

Dark minds

Dark rooms

With Fate inside

Clouded eyes

Crowded room

This Clouded hope 

Smells of doom

Rhyming lines

Leave behind

A sordid story

In a pensive mind

Weeping Woman

Embraces suffering like an old friend

walks with her head surrendered

looks up only when dreaming of joy

her heart is ignorant of its own wonders


Her mirror is a friend and a foe

that smile – a guileless weapon

her sorrow has more courage

those tears – precious heathens


Lives inside a guiltless frame

becomes real to all those who walk by

and if they see those tears up close

they’ll find Dora Maar has just smiled…




Why leave the fairy lights?

Blinded by their wistful sighs

When you could close their eyes to let their light breathe in


Why leave behind this happy cloud?

Become another face in the crowd

The beauty your eyes seek can only be found within


Darkness is a bad influence

It feeds on sad remembrance

Perhaps it’s best to surrender to it with a smile


Silence is contagious

Its peace deemed too precious

Only the heart knows the beauty of an unsung song


Love that’s an epiphany

Is often mistaken for destiny

Your fate is a reflection of your heart


Soul is a lonely friend

Surviving in ignored bookends

Perhaps it’s time to open your heart and let it in for a while


Conscience is a worthy adversary

Almost always defeated by false bravery

Make it your friend for a dreamless night


Those fairy lights they beckon

Rumi has spoken

“It is your light that lights the world”



This piece of me sits alone

My words lurk in rusty corners

They don’t fit in a box

But they aren’t free just yet!


This ink that bleeds out my soul

Flows without direction

Each curve fills me up

Drowns me in drops of empty regrets


What category?  What genre?

What theme am I?

Am I that condescending voice

forever without -definition?


Why do these words need an indent?

Why a structure? Why a sentence?

Did I create this to fit in?

or is rarity my ascension?


This piece of me doesn’t know

Whether it is the lone drop in the sea,

Or a snowflake descending

Or is it just a desperate scream of the meek.


This piece of me doesn’t fit

the precious glass slipper

It is not stuck in a list

This piece of me…is just…me