This.
This.
This is what my silence looks like
A dark room full of unknown faces
All of your eyes on me
Waiting for words that just
Don’t
Come.
These are my hands
Trembling at the thought
Of wading past an ocean of thousands of you
At the end of this night
Swaying me with your tides
Invading my silence over and over again
This is also my space
Empty but for my breath
These walls are my friends
All the same colour
But each with a different heartbeat
Slowly teaching me…. How to be
The space holds in it years
Of avoiding strangers like you
It’s what our mothers used to say right?
But while I was busy warding off the evil
I’ve also kept a few new souls away
It’s a price I pay and I pay it in plenty
And from where I’m standing
Silence is a precious prize
You’ll call me the quiet one
Wonder why I look scared
When you call me beautiful
Sigh when I look away each time you try to smile at me
Wonder why I have nothing to say
When you say my words have changed your life
You’ll deem me just a mystery
Intertwined with your life for no reason
“She’s just shy”, others will say
And you will wonder why I am not that shy on this stage
You don’t see what I see
You don’t see my blank space
This is also my canvas
Where I paint stories
Through relentless strokes of my mind
Stories of unrequited love and outraged fists raised in hope
Stuffed in jars like fireflies lighting up my nights
Where my realities collide
Burning through my dark skies like fire
Until my words like stars turn into dust
You may call me the introvert
Claim I dwell in caves
While I spend my weekends in empty rooms
This mind tethering at the edge of my page
You may even give up and walk away
To never come back again
But this.
This.
This thing u call a blank space
And shrug off because it’s empty
This is my whole world, my masterpiece!
And you…..are just a background.